Wow, I did it! We did it! We lasted twenty-four hours, now we can sleep. I don't know what else to say, I'm running on fumes right now.

If any of you guys want to friend me I'll be over on my brienakiaccount. I probably won't be posting for a bit, I think I'm all post out. 

Great now I'm too excited to sleep!

Today I wasn’t only blogging to help animals but to help myself. Posting on blogs and conversing with people has been a very hard thing for me to do. Social anxiety made it near impossible to interact with any one. Finally this past January I was able to get on some depression anxiety medication and I started to feel normal. I stopped worrying about what people thought of me.

I want to make a thank you post to all the people who’ve been so nice today. I threw myself into the blogathon head first with really no plan other then to help the Animal Humane Society and become more sociable. I think I’ve done fairly well, I’ve made more posts then I ever have, but most of all I commented freely on peoples blogs which was something I was terrified to do just last year.

For me there was no backing out of this, so all I could do is go forward. Lack of sleep has left my brain… dumb? Uh oh, I’m losing my vocabulary. Really all I want to say is thank you to all of you who’ve commented and friended me.

Is it over yet? I'm so tired... 

Only a few more posts to go. Yay! 

Sylvester absolutely loves Joe, out of everyone in the house Sylvester loves Joe. 

This time the dog's mine, this is Marcellus, our Australian Shepherd.

I was debating on whether I should post this or not, mostly because they're not my dogs, but these two are the freakin cutest dogs that I have ever seen. 

And here are some pictures of Sylvester.


Edit: Fixed spelling errors.

Here some pictures.

p.26 in Room to Write By Bonni Goldberg 

Write about an aspect of nature, either human or environmental, that intrigues you. Or, spend one page on both senses of nature and then connect the two. 

I wrote this over a year ago.

The most interesting thing I find about nature is murder. Well, not murder exactly only humans murder or do they? A dog will eat it’s young if hungry and there’s no food to be found. An immature rabbit will chew hers to death if she was too young to care for them. A lion will kill cubs that aren’t his. So they are capable of killing but not of murdering why? Animals do not have a sense of right and wrong, they have no moral code. Yet even then they do not kill without reason or what they think is reason. A cat will naturally catch a mouse that it won’t eat but will leave on your bed, why? Why does it do this? Instinct but why do they continue to have an instinct that is useless to them. Why do we have instincts that are useless to us?

Surely in the entire world there have been animals that kill without reason or maybe we give them a reason when there is none. A hungry dog eating her young is reasonable, especially when she is tied up. But then why do people say “what made this dog go against nature and eat its young?” The dog did not go AGAINST nature it went with nature. A dog has no sense of what is right and wrong, it was hungry she couldn’t feed her babies so she ate them. Now she can live to have more babies that will thrive. Nature is survival of the fittest and with no food those puppies wouldn’t be fit at all.

Why do people insist on giving animals human attributes? My dog does this because he’s lonely. Your dog does that because it’s a DOG. It behaves how a dog behaves. Dogs are pack animals and they need people, not only for social but for the hierarchy. A dog needs to know where it stands if it doesn’t, it assumes it’s boss and the dog does what he wants.

I do not assume to know all about dogs and nor can I blame these people to much as I was one of them. I gave a guinea pig a heart attack because at the age of 4 I thought the guinea pig would have fun on a trampoline, like I did. I would not think this would give her a heart attack as I did not know what one was but I was smart enough to know that I needed to watch my feet so as not to squish her.

I then have to look at all the times I assumed my pets would be happy if I gave them things I was happy with. For Runner, my hamster, I built with pop cans a jungle gym for him to play on. This was useless as he did not play nor did he ever use my pop can gym. But how I thought he would love it as I would of loved things to climb on like that. Even long before the pop can gym I was putting my toys in the guinea pig cage, I cannot remember this but I have seen the picture I can already assume I was doing this because I thought they would be happier with toys.

Then I look at how many times I say I love you to my pets and how useless it really is, as they don’t understand it. But I’ll continue to say it because it makes me feel better to know I do love them. Someday if they are able to understand, then they will know they were very much loved. 


I can't remember where I heard this either on the discovery or National Geographic channel, some dolphins actually kill for fun! I couldn't believe it when I heard that, I love dolphins.

My computers being difficult so I need to reboot. I'll post a little later.

We're not even done yet and I'm already planning on doing this next year. I'm disappointed that I did not put much effort or thought into this, as I should have. So I'm hoping next year to actually have more content and to be more active in my charity.

Volunteering at the local human society would be the way to go. The only reason I haven't is I don't have a driver license. But I will be rectifying that soon so I will have no excuse not to go help out. I only worry that I’ll end up adopting the ferrets that come in or an older dog.

I’ll be working next year on better graphics, better promotion, and better posts. Well as my Mom says, ‘Now you know what to expect.’ And now I expect it to not be as easy as it looks. Post every 30 minutes for 24 hours? Sure no problem. It couldn’t be that hard. Oh now I know better.

Hugo and Hubert have been really active today, I wonder if they’re getting used to me. If anything they’re used to Buddy sitting over their cage watching for them to pop out. The mice don’t seem to mind him that much, coming out to sniff him. Buddy keeps trying to tip the cage over.

Anyway here are some pictures of Hugo and Hubert in a tub while I cleaned their cage. And no I don’t know which ones which. 

Writing is hard, I acknowledge this and the fact that getting your mind to concentrate on writing is also difficult. Have I ever struck a balance with anything? Not all the time but with drawing. It’s like jump rope the first few jumps you get the rhythm and if all goes well you just feel it. You know when that rope hits the ground and you feel yourself in tune with the rope and nothing else. But then you get tired and soon you can’t jump as high and you lose the rhythm, that feeling, that high, even though it has gone you know you’ll get it back after all once you know how to jump rope it doesn’t take you long to get back into the swing of things.

That’s how I get with drawing and I believe I’ll get that way with writing. It’s all in that rhythm. That gorgeous, lush rhythm. You just have to feel it but it takes a little bit to get into it. So with writing I have to remember the first few minutes may be uneasy but if you keep writing you’ll find that rhythm.

That writer’s high is great. I can’t remember a time when I got it, as it’s been a while sense I’ve written anything worthwhile but I know how it feels and can’t wait to feel it again.

I want to write because I don’t know, the rhythm maybe. The feeling I get when I seem to place the words and sentences just right and it feels good. Knowing that when I write something down it’s there and one last thing for me to have to think about again. Now if I could only begin writing stories, then maybe I would feel grand. But I feel happy when I reread some of my older pieces. I have evolved and I’m always improving.

Beds I have slept in.

There really are many different kinds of beds in the world and so many different types of sheets and comforters. My current bed is actually a pretty good size. With a royal purple bedding. With industrial stripes of darker and lighter purples for the pillow covers and top of the comforter. The back of the comforter is two dark purples in a circle and flower like pattern. The sheet is striped with erratic stripes in those stripes. I always sleep on this fuzzy blanket I got from Pier 1, I always curl up in it although lately it’s been too hot so I don’t right now. I also have two fuzzy pillows like the blanket.

My old comforter was purple and white, mostly a stripe like pattern with a purple back. The ferrets have now inherited the blanket. The oldest comforter I remember is a white one with big roses on it.

I had my own bedroom once at Grandma and Grandpa’s house, but it is now Eric’s. Although they always say it’s for any one who wants to use it. I know they say that to not alienate me but I have to think it is Eric’s room, that’s his room no one else’s. So later I began to sleep in the big living room. On the pull out couch. Unfortunately it was flat and uncomfortable with the metal bar going across the middle. I’m glad I’m old enough to not have to go to their house any more to stay. I was so pissed the last time. I believe I had a fight with Mom.

I’ve slept at the cabin in both the beds and the couch. Some days in the twin bedroom room, the beds would be apart and other they’d be together. I generally slept on the top. I would climb up using the footboard. There was no ladder. Eric and me loved to play in the twin bedroom. I broke a window once or Eric did by throwing tinker toy when we were fighting with the tinker weapons. Right a way I had a us go out and tell Grandpa just as he was coming up the stairs on the deck.

I slept in the bigger bed when I was upset and wanted to go home. I would often get home sick and Grandpa would come out and sit with me for a while, he did this too at his house when I’d get home sick. We’d go sit in his big EZ Boy chair and watch TV. I slept on the couch at the cabin once, when Amy my Mom’s friend, came up. She began snoring at night and I couldn’t sleep so I did something I had never done because I hated doing it, I went out and slept on the couch. It was flat and uncomfortable, not to mention it smelt funny, seeing how old it was, with the ugly 70’s yellow colors and flowers. I felt bad because I didn’t want to insult Amy. I stayed up hoping Mom would notice I left the room.

Sleeping in public is something I hate. I hate knowing any one can see me when I’m not awake. I hated sleeping in the living room at Grandma and Grandpas for that reason. I was scared someone would come in see that I’m awake and leave the door open. Which happened sometimes. And then Eric would come in. I just wanted a few minutes of alone time, which I don’t get there because there is no room that I can shut myself in. So I’d fake sleep for a while longer. Which brings me to another thing I hate, being the last one up or having someone up before me. I loathe that. At Grandma and Grandpa’s it always happened. It always leaves me feeling out of sync.

Another bed was the first and only time I slept over at Izzy’s. I absolutely hated it. I cried most the night. Wondering if I could just sneak home and go to bed. I remember Jennifer coming by I wonder if she noticed I was crying, if she did she didn’t say anything.

I slept on the couch at home a lot. Usually during the summer, when it was hot and the only rooms that had AC were Mom’s room and the Living Room. My bedroom became the living room for quite a few months. I even had an air mattress for a while which Joey also slept on. I slept on Eric’s little mattress up in Mom’s room sometimes. I slept in Mom’s bed a lot too. Generally during, you guess it, the summer.

Other beds, hotel beds, no actually I had a couch… I slept on a freaken’ fold out couch for my vacation, awesome. I also hated it too as I was out in the open, with a window inside the building with only a shear curtain. I also slept at Allen and Sheryl’s house, in their guest bedroom. It sucked because everybody was upstairs and I was by myself… At least I was by myself, and not sleeping out in the open.

Five minutes on Windows

Windows are nice. I always loved looking out my window in my old room. I could see who was here at any time, which is nice, when I don’t want to visit with any one. I especially liked the view at night with the light post, its where a lot of my dreams ended at that light post in the night. I always wanted to paint it but now since they put the privacy fence up it’s different or it could be the fact I don’t look out that window much any more. I can’t really think of any memories involving windows, me and Eric broke one as you know. I got a scar from one. I was climbing through the window from the porch to the dining room one time, I had done it many times before, and some how this nail that was bent so it could keep that big glass panel on during the winter, caught my arm and took a big chunk out of my flesh. I’m must have been going through the window to fast or lost my balance, I don’t remember or my shirt got caught. Now the scar has faded no one would notice it now. I’m kind of disappointed in that. I kind of like my smaller scars.